i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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