But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
