Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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