every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
