ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
