I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
