went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize