The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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