You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Randomize
