You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
soo... how was my night?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
