his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
