porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
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