is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Randomize
