My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
