Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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