Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
