I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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