Have you finally orgasmed yet?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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