So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Randomize