whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
