Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
