i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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