She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
My life is pants optional.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
