Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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