i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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