and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
