i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
