I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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