I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize