I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
i've created a new STD.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
