Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
