I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize