Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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