How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize