And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
