Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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