I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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