Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
