i think my tv is drunk
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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