Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
