Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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