just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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