I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
