cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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