i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
