Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
