another moral hangover. fuck.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize