she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
