i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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