Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
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