My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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